Day 26 - The Best Medicine

Courtney’s day started off as planned with an ultrasound of her gall bladder and liver. Her sister, Tracy, related the following:

“I have to tell a funny story from this morning...she was transported downstairs to the ultrasound room, had her scan and she and I were waiting for them to bring her back upstairs. A girl and a guy came in and said hello and that they were ready to take us back upstairs to her room. Courtney looked at both of them and said "I will give you $20.00 to take me home" and they laughed. She looked at me and then said "I will give you a $100.00 to take me home" and they laughed again and said they just couldn't but it was tempting! So she looked at me again so I said "I'll throw in 100 bucks to the pot to take her home!" and Courtney said "she can throw in more than that!!" Well, none of it worked and we are back in her room but we smiled and giggled. Oh, one more thing, once she woke from a catnap and realized she was in her room she looked at me and said "Why didn't you pay them more?!””

The morning was filled with a good dose of laughter. I can’t tell you how nice it was to see this. Her laugh was the best thing I’ve seen in a long time. It might have been somewhat drug induced, but it was genuine. And just 48 hours earlier, no amount of drugs were going to help produce a laugh from her. The laughter alone made today a better day.

Her CBC results also made today a better day –
WBC = 800 (Still rising)
%Neutrophils = 57%
Absolute Neutrophils = 500 (half way there!)
%Blasts = 1% (While we’d rather see zero, no need for alarm yet.)

I got to her room today just as the gastroenterologist was paying her a visit. He said that her bilirubin levels were back to normal and that the ultrasound showed nothing to be concerned of. In fact, he gave her a clean bill of health with regards to her liver (no hepatitis) and gall bladder (no blockage or gall stones).

Shortly after the GI doctor’s visit, her primary care doctor, Dr. Bolagi, showed up. He’s visited her on all but two days since she’s been in the hospital. He was glad to see her sitting up in a chair, eating food and in relatively good spirits. He said he was glad to see better blood results. He also said the edema (swelling throughout her body) should improve as her eating improves and as they cut back on her fluids. He said that while he could give her albumin, he’d prefer to let the body beat that on its own, rather than introducing more substances into her body.

Around noon, Tracy cut Courtney’s hair even shorter. She gave her a really short bob that was quite cute. I had actually brought the clippers with me, but Courtney decided to try to save the little hair she had while she had it.

It wouldn’t last, however. And by the end of the day, it had become evident that the best thing to do would be to shave it all off. Easier said than done. I can’t imagine that Courtney ever planned on showing me the true shape of her head. I doubt that many women would want their husbands to see them that way, or even see themselves that way. It’s hard to say good-bye to something that literally is part of who you are and who you always have been. It might be just hair and it will grow back, but those facts only slightly mitigate the difficulty of removing a woman’s hair. Lots of tears were shed. I think the hardest part for Courtney wasn’t so much the actual shaving as it was having to face the fact that she’s having to shave because she has cancer.

Yet, despite the swelling, despite not having seen her children for 11 days, despite having to spend her 27th straight night in the hospital, despite her swollen feet and ankles that reminded her of Princess Fiona’s from Shrek, and despite the loss of her hair that she spent the past year growing out, she managed to have a few little laughs and some genuine smiles at the end of a very emotional day.

I must say that Courtney has a very cute melon. I had to remind her that it wasn’t her hair that first caught my attention 10 years ago. It was her beautiful eyes and gorgeous smile that had me smitten from day one. And cancer hasn’t touched those one bit.